Say Goodbye to Impulsivity: How Mindfulness and NVC Can Help You Take Control

Ben H
3 min readFeb 23, 2023

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Photo by Sigmund on Unsplash

Impulsivity is a common issue that can affect many aspects of our lives, including relationships, decision making, and overall well-being. Impulsivity is the tendency to act quickly without thinking through the potential consequences of our actions. This can result in behavior that we later regret, or that leads to negative outcomes for ourselves and others.

Fortunately, there are many strategies that can help us reduce impulsivity and develop more thoughtful, deliberate behaviors. In this article, we will explore eight effective ways to reduce impulsivity through deliberate practice and applying Nonviolent Communication (NVC) principles.

  1. Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment without judgment. By becoming more aware of our thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations, we can develop greater self-control and reduce impulsivity. Mindfulness practices such as meditation and deep breathing can help us to stay grounded and present, even in situations where we might feel overwhelmed or triggered.

2. Identify triggers

It’s important to identify the situations or circumstances that trigger impulsive behavior. By understanding the root causes of our impulsivity, we can better prepare ourselves to respond in more deliberate and thoughtful ways. For example, if we know that we tend to act impulsively when we’re feeling stressed or anxious, we can develop coping strategies to manage those feelings in healthier ways.

3. Delay gratification

Impulsivity often involves seeking immediate gratification rather than considering long-term consequences. By intentionally delaying gratification, we can practice self-discipline and develop more thoughtful decision-making skills. This can involve setting goals and rewards for ourselves, or simply reminding ourselves to take a step back and consider the potential consequences of our actions.

4. Use NVC principles

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a communication technique that emphasizes empathy, active listening, and expressing oneself in a non-judgmental way. By applying NVC principles to our interactions with others, we can reduce the likelihood of impulsive behavior, such as reacting defensively or lashing out in anger. Instead, we can communicate in ways that are more thoughtful and respectful, even in challenging situations.

5. Practice self-compassion

Self-compassion involves treating ourselves with kindness and understanding, even when we make mistakes or experience setbacks. By cultivating self-compassion, we can reduce feelings of shame or guilt that can contribute to impulsive behavior. Instead, we can approach ourselves and our actions with greater understanding and acceptance.

6. Set clear goals

Setting clear goals can help us to stay focused and motivated, rather than acting impulsively based on our immediate desires or feelings. By setting specific, achievable goals, we can develop a sense of purpose and direction that guides our behavior in more deliberate ways.

7. Seek support

Developing more deliberate behaviors can be challenging, and it’s important to seek support from others when we need it. This can involve seeking guidance from a therapist or counselor, joining a support group, or simply confiding in a trusted friend or family member. By building a support system, we can develop greater resilience and learn new skills for managing impulsivity.

8. Practice self-reflection

Self-reflection involves taking the time to examine our thoughts, feelings, and actions in a non-judgmental way. By reflecting on our experiences, we can identify patterns of behavior that contribute to impulsivity and develop strategies for responding in more deliberate ways. This can involve journaling, meditation, or simply taking a few minutes each day to reflect on our experiences.

Reducing impulsivity takes deliberate practice and patience, but the benefits are worth the effort. By developing greater self-awareness, self-control, and communication skills, we can improve our relationships, decision-making abilities, and overall well-being.

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Ben H

Exploring the intersection of Peace Building,Emotional Health, Nonviolent Communication, Personal Growth, Spirituality, Artificial Intelligence and Technology.